I was reading about different social theories a while ago, and something stayed with me.
We often create rules, standards, expectations—almost as if someone, somewhere, has the authority to decide what’s “right” for everyone. But isn’t that… subjective? What feels completely right to one person can feel entirely wrong to someone else.
And then comes the bigger question—if everything is subjective, how do we even function as a society?
Maybe the answer isn’t stricter definitions, but more space.
Somewhere along the way, we started confusing guidance with control. We observe someone’s life, build a perception of how it should look, and then quietly expect them to fit into it. And the moment they don’t, it feels like they’ve deviated—when in reality, they’ve just chosen differently.
Take something as simple as career paths. Medicine, dentistry, a B.Sc., anything really. Some of these paths do come with structure—certain steps that are necessary, certain qualifications you can’t skip.
But even within that, why do we assume there’s only one right way to live through it? One timeline, one definition of success, one way your life should look alongside it.
That’s where it stops being about structure—and starts becoming expectation.
At what point did we start believing we have a say in how someone else should live their life?
Because the moment you hand over your choices to someone else—even with good intentions—you’re also handing over your sense of ownership. And that’s where regret quietly begins.
You can advise. You can share your perspective. But you can’t dictate someone else’s life. That was never yours to control.
Maybe what we actually need as a society isn’t more rules, but more conversations. Less assumption, more understanding. Less “this is how it should be,” and more “tell me how you see it.”
So I’m wondering-
Are we genuinely trying to understand each other, or are we just creating a more socially acceptable illusion of understanding?
MBH/PS