That One Negative Comment you keep Replaying - Why?

You might have made a mistake in the work you did a month ago. Your superior might have criticized you for that. It’s been days since that incident.

Even today, you remember those negative comments and replay them sometimes.

A hurtful comment your friend said, an exam that you scored less and your teacher insulted you in front of your class. You still remember those negative words exactly, line by line.

Even with days passing by and positive events around us, that one negative moment keeps replaying in your mind.

Ever wondered why? Why are negative comments more sticking around than positive ones?

Research suggests that it may be due to Negativity bias. We sometimes tend to pay more attention to the negative events than the positive ones. It may be a part of evolution. For our ancestors, survival was essential. They may have paid attention to events like rustling in bushes, to be alert to a threat or danger.

Over generations, that alert and attention to negative events may have shaped the brain systems to focus a little more on that.

You might not remember the applause you got for your speech, but you might still remember the criticism for the one word you spelled incorrectly.

It’s common to replay negative events, but it shouldn’t be stuck in a loop.

Have you caught yourself replaying a negative event that happened months before? Any tips on how you manage when those negative thoughts replay?

MBH/PS

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Negative comments remain in memory more as they are attached to strong feelings of emotions

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This is very much relatable to me. I have a habit of replaying and regretting things. But I deal it with a technique called 5 4 3 2 1 STOP. It is actually a cope up mechanism wherein we count back from 5. And after 1 we say stop, as a command to our brain to stop thinking about issue that is bothering us.

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Absolutely @Akshaya Negativity bias is something many of us experience. I’ve found that reminding myself of the lessons from the situation rather than replaying the criticism itself, helps me move forward. One mistake doesn’t define our abilities, how we learn from it does.

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Negative comments stays longer and you can even remember exact words as well. And when similar situation aries you might remember all negative comments that you have heard. All you have to trust yourself and don’t let negative comments decrease your confidence

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I usually stop myself before I spiral, distract myself with a hobby

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