It feels like we’re living in an era where everyone is a bit more sensitive, but it makes me wonder: are we actually getting more emotional, or have we just forgotten how to handle constructive advice?
In medicine and academics, people are often blunt. If a mentor or teacher calls you out in front of a group, the gut reaction is to feel demeaned. But usually, it isn’t about shaming you; it’s about making sure you actually learn the lesson. We get so used to being “babied” that even a slightly sharp comment feels like an attack once we’re adults.
To stay sane, you have to learn to categorise what you’re hearing:
1. The “Raw” Feedback Constructive criticism doesn’t always come wrapped in a gift box. Sometimes it’s honest, raw, and incredibly blunt. If you’re unsure, just ask: “Did you mean that as a way for me to improve?” If the answer is yes, take the ego out of it, reflect, and implement the change.
2. The Noise (Hate) Then there’s pure criticism or hate. Honestly? It shouldn’t matter. You can skim it to see if there’s a tiny grain of truth you can use for your own benefit, but otherwise, let it go. Most people like this are just looking for a reaction—don’t give them the satisfaction.
At the end of the day, you need people in your corner who are willing to tell you when you’re heading in the wrong direction. Without that, you stop growing.
I’m curious, how do you handle a situation where the feedback feels “gray”? How do you decide if it’s a lesson or just hate?
MBH/PS